whenever somebody says like “so what did you do today?” just look off into the distance and say “the right thing”
being “cute” is really hard because even when youre angry people just kinda giggle at you and say “aw youre so cute when youre angry.” no. stop. recognize my power.
to the prankster who put “the moon” as the address on their online pizza delivery order: thanks a whole dang lot. i was up there for like ten minutes just aimlesly waiting, ringing the doorbell, kicking moon rocks around